So, this week was back to the 5.45am wakeup call for the gym.
Really tough after such a nice two weeks of lying in, eating pretty
much what I want, putting off the day when I’d have to work hard to lose it
again.
The last year has seen me lose a fair bit of weight. The comments,
I guess are nice – ‘oh you’re looking good’ or ‘I thought you were looking trim’.
But as I’ve got back into some fitness, I’ve realised a subtle undertone to my
responses of ‘thank you’ – ‘yes, I have worked hard for this’.
Early mornings.
Deadly spin classes.
Monotonous laps in the pool.
I’ve worked hard.
I deserve it…
The whole weight-loss fitness thing can have its religious overtones
of course. I consult my healthy food ‘Bible’. I might ‘confess’ to my wife if I’ve
contravened a ‘2’ day (yes the dreaded 5:2
diet). I try to ‘be good’ but don’t always succeed. I even dress the part
in my Ron Burgundy sweatbands (that’s a joke btw).
Why it’s harder than ever to stay fit
So why is it harder to keep fit nowadays? And why might that fuel
my pride in my achievements? There’s probably several reasons, but here’s just
two.
The first is our sedentary lifestyle. Technology has led to amazing
advances in how we work, but has meant that to stay fit we have to put more
effort in, often in our ‘spare time’. In years past, manual work and house work
without white goods meant more natural fitness from our daily lives. If we ‘looked
good’ then big deal, it’s just what we did; it often didn’t mean extra effort
or planning.
A second factor is the rise of sugar and fat-laden foods that are
so readily available. We’ve gone from consuming roughly 2 kilos of sugar a year
at the end of the 1800s to roughly the same in a week (!). Cheaper and
quick-to-prepare/order ready meals, ideal for our fast pace of life, add to the
problem.
Performance-driven identity
What’s the problem here? Sure, when I am scoffing my face with
these rather tasty Bojangles Christmas chocolates (I’ve got to finish them
soon, right!?), I feel good – for a while. But then the guilt and self-loathing
begins. And the comparisons – I’ll never be as fit as so and so. Unlike my
brother, I’ll never be able to give up chocolate!
And when I’m winning in the gym? I feel good – for a while. And then
I start comparing myself to others again. This time, my verdict is that I’m
more disciplined, committed….better.
There is such a temptation to let my performance in fitness (but
not only there, in so many other arenas too) dictate my identity. To determine
who I can look down on to make me feel better…accepted…saved even.
Acceptance-driven identity
This is where the message of Christianity is such good news. We
are accepted by God, not because of what we do, but what Jesus has done.
As Tim Keller famously said,
The gospel is the good news of gracious acceptance…Christians who trust in Christ for their acceptance with God, rather than in their own moral character, commitment, or performance, are simul iustus et peccator – simultaneously sinful yet accepted. We are more flawed and sinful than we ever dared believe, yet we are more loved and accepted than we ever dared hope at the same time.’
I don’t have to perform for anyone. My self-worth and identity isn’t
dependent on how I look, or how hard I’ve worked, or if I’m fitter than someone
else.
As Keller finishes his excellent little booklet ‘The Freedom of
Self-Forgetfulness’:
Like (the apostle) Paul, we can say, ‘I don’t care what you think. I don’t even care what I think. I only care about what the Lord thinks.’ And he has said, ‘Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus’, and, ‘You are my beloved child in whom I am well pleased’.
My hard work is a response to the ultimate work Jesus did for me
in dying on the cross to free me from pride and find a stable identity,
accepted in him. As a Christ-follower, when in the gym, and in life, I can let my acceptance drive my performance – not the other way around.
